Unworthy and Thankful

“I am unworthy of all the kindness and faithfulness you have shown your servant. I had only my staff when I crossed this Jordan, but now I have become two groups.”
Genesis 32:10

Do you ever feel unworthy? I do and to be honest I do so quite frequently. Sometimes, others make me feel unworthy because I don’t fit into some sort of world defined mold. Sometimes I make myself feel unworthy - because of my own unrealistic expectations. Sometimes, the shear enormousness of God and what He has called me to do makes me feel unworthy. Ever feel thankful for being unworthy? That’s a bit harder to do when you are struggling with your worthiness. That where I find myself as I write this - unworthy but still thankful.

This week’s passage is part of a prayer from man who is unworthy but also thankful. Jacob had run from home after double crossing his brother and taking the blessing meant for the eldest son. God had been with all the years of his self imposed exile - helping him to become a shrew man, who managed to amass great wealth while working for his father-in-law. God has told him it is time to go home and make peace with his brother. In the prayer Jacob acknowledges God and the instructions he has been given. Then he admits he is no worthy all that God has provided for him - he had nothing and now he is returning home with two huge households’ people and the wealth that livestock meant in those days. While he doesn’t come right out and say he is thankful - the tone of his prayer is clearly one of incredible thanks.

I think the veiled blessing of being unworthy and let’s face it - in the light of a holy God we are all a bit unworthy at best and completely unworthy at worse - we find blessing because our unworthiness makes us reliant on God. Recognizing our need of Him, allows Him to change us, to make us worthy in His eyes (even while we still feel unworthy) worthy of all His amazing kindness, faithfulness, protection, grace and love. That my friends is something to be thankful for indeed.

Has someone made you feel unworthy? Do you make yourself feel unworthy? Have you been called to do something that you feel unworthy to do? Lean into Jesus - know that in His eyes you are more than worthy and He’ll show you if you’ll let him.

I am unworthy and thankful - what about you?

A Prayer
Father –on our own we are unworthy of all you have given us. Yet your Son offers us grace and love that makes us worthy in Your eyes. Thank you for the kindness and faithfulness you show us daily. Help us to not make others feel unworthy, rather show us how to lift one another up, encouraging each other. In the name of Jesus, who makes us worthy – Amen.